the cat

There's a polydactyl cat that lives next door that would definitely be my evil nemesis, were I any kind of superhero.

It's actually not even really NEXT DOOR, its like sort of IN MY HOUSe. We live in a triple decker whose structure holds two separate addresses. Side A: beautiful new refurbished condos, owner occupied. Side B: section eight housing. I kid you not. We had no idea when we bought the place. Nor did any realtor give us the heads up. So the front of the building we share a balcony with our next door neighbor that is separated by a plywood barrier. My side: wooden bench, outdoor carpet, end tables, candles, solar powered night time lighting. Their side: office chair, plastic dinosaur, beer bottles, and a temperamental screen door that their has the ability to open at will. So the cat first appeared at my window in the fall,a nd I had no idea whose it was...I thought he might have just climbed up since we live on the second story. No. I actually tried to *set him free* by putting him on my back balcony, and then got threatened by our neighbor who indicated that the cat was indeed his and I was never to touch it again (yes, the same one whose apartment was shot at). So. I now leave the cat alone.

Yet Nubs (that's what I call him because he's got those weird thimbs that some cats have) keeps coming back. I took to spraying him with water, which is a temporary fix -- he seems to hate water. But he keeps coming back. And now that it's lovely weather and I've planted pink begonias and some greenery in my flower box, we are at the mercy of the Nubster. He chews on my ornamental grasses and scratches at my rug. And the other day, he was left out too long and defecated and urinated all over our balcony area.

I can't tell you what that did to me. I actually wanted to call the cops. I called my friend whose husband is a lawyer. I was just so thoroughly DISGUSTED. I mean...it IS disgusting. It's gross, and cat pee cant be but one of the top five worst smells in the universe. But this was deeper. I felt like shame, like self-hatred for not being able to anticipate the fact that we were going to have to live near struggling people. And total, utter, loathing for my neighbors. And I hear the Lord (fourth time this year) tell me...."You despise the poor."

That was really hard to hear.

It's completely true, though. I have absolutely no idea how to see my Lord through the owners of Nubs. I hate their lack of education, their (apparent) laziness, their disregard for personal property and their ill-defined family structure. There's this depravity that I project onto them that I know is lurking in my own heart. I hate it in myself, and I hate being reminded of it by my neighbors. I want so badly to find common ground and love them and get along, but it seems so impossible...but I told the Lord that I want to be healed of this prejudice, and He's been known to perform bigger miracles than that.

In the meantime, I bought a bottle of Critter Away and sprayed the crap out of the area. Hopefully Nubs will be dissuaded enough by the smell to hang out with the plastic toys on the other side of the plywood.